If it hurts you're probably doing it wrong

...which can be said about oh, so many things, but in this case I'm talking about 'me-time'. That's right, those precious few hours a week (if we're extremely lucky) that moms get to spend on ourselves and ONLY ourselves. It occurred to me recently that everything I do for me-time these days involves pain in one form or another, and to be honest, I find this a little disturbing.

For example, on the rare occasion that I get me-time, I spend most of it exercising. I power-hike one of several routes around my extremely hilly neighborhood, or if me-time happens to occur on a Sunday afternoon, I go to a bellydance class that a friend of mine teaches. Now, exercise is great and contributes substantially to my energy level and sense of well-being and all, but because I don't do it every day, it kind of hurts. Especially the next day. Especially if I forgo stretching afterwards in favor of getting somebody's dinner ready or cleaning up a mess or sorting out kid drama, which is almost inevitably the case when I get home from me-time workouts.

I also make it a point to go in for bikini sugaring appointments every few weeks. It's a great me-time experience in that I get to hang out at an upscale salon with very peaceful ambience and excellent customer service where they serve me coffee and pastries while I wait for for my appointment to start. For those of you who are unfamiliar with the sugaring process, it's similar to waxing but uses a mixture of sugar and other stuff that manages to grab only the hair and not the layers of skin that wax tends to take with it. In other words it gives the same smoooooth result but it's not even in the same ballpark of pain and post-treatment rashiness as waxing, which is why I do it instead. I wouldn't exactly say it's a picnic, though. There's pretty much no way to make getting your pubic hair ripped out by the follicles a completely pain-free experience. (Btw, the hubby & I both agree it's TOTALLY worth it!)

And every once in a great while, I spend my me-time shopping. I hate shopping. I may be the only gal in The OC who doesn't get any benefit whatsoever from retail therapy. I find shopping psychologically painful and I will avoid it at all costs until absolutely necessary. Trying on a whole bunch of clothes that mostly don't fit right and/or look weird just to find a couple of wearable items only serves as a reminder that, while I may be awesomely hot in my own unique way, I don't have the kind of figure the American fashion industry caters to. It's very discouraging and makes me consider moving to the tropics and adopting a nudist lifestyle. Also, in the case of bra shopping (which I really should consider doing in the near future, since I am still wearing nursing bras half the time in spite of the fact that my youngest weaned herself several months ago), it can be physically painful as well. Ladies, you know what I'm talking about.

So I have been pondering why it should be the case that everything I do for myself hurts. Do I have a self-destructive streak? At one point in my life that was true, but I'm well over it now and I don't have the spare time or energy for that level of drama anymore, so I'm pretty sure that's not it. Do I harbor guilt about doing fun things without my kids? No, I can't really say that I do. Which leaves me with two conclusions. First, that my priorities tend to be oriented toward long-term benefit over instant gratification. Okay, I can live with that. Second, that I really SHOULD make it a point to schedule some me-time activities that DON'T hurt every once in a while.

That being said, I already have some really special me-time planned for next week. I have a whole hour set aside to relax in a comfortable chair under warm lights, listening to soothing music playing in the background while I get taken care of by somebody else for a change.

That's right.

I have a dentist appointment.